This years Badgers AGM (All Got Mullered!) Luncheon was held on the 30th June 2006 aboard the 'Leven Is Strijd', a converted dutch barge moored up alongside West India Quay at Canary Wharf. Twenty Badgers attended the festivities, and a rioutous afternoon was enjoyed by all (according to the staff, as none of us can remember it!). For those who came aboard the 'Leven Is Strijd', life really was a struggle as we tried to keep up with Sharpie's alcohol intake but it was a memorable afternoon and we shall definitely be returning next year (if they'll have us!).
The Badgers at Lunch
First speech after dinner was given by the outgoing captain Mike Stone, thanking the Committee for their hard work during the year and the Leven for a great meal. Next up, on behalf of the Committee was Alec Vallintine to deliver the summary of the year and announce the placings for the 2005-2006 season, the appointment of the new Badger Captain and the inaugural awarding of the Badger Captains Trophy.
The Badger Captains Trophy - 'The Victorous Badger' aka 'Is it Dead?'
Thanks was given to all the members for their support through the year, to the contractors who sponsored the prizes at the golf days this year (Cablecom, PIP and Commercial Stone who sponsored the days at Birchwood, South Essex and Darenth Valley respectively) and Mike Stone for his tenure of captaincy of the Badgers, even if he did think it gave him the right to turn up at the Badger days in any old shirt he wanted, and we have the photos of Birchwood on the website to prove it. As Mark Smith would say – outrageous! When Mike heard he was to be captain he asked what was expected of him. Nothing we said, it’s merely an honorary title in recognition of your efforts over the year so you can do as little as you like. So he did. Unlike Sharpie who was very active this season and during the meal with the waitresses!
Me Sharpie, You Jane
Under the patronage of Mike, 2005-2006 was been another good year for the Badgers with 4 well attended golf days at Lullingstone, Birchwood, South Essex and Darenth Valley and an increase in members to 40. The website goes from strength to strength and some of you even use it to download the meticulously prepared directions available for download for each golf day. Others of you simply ring us up for directions on the morning such as that fat, lazy bastard Nigel Smith, not that we're bitter!
The Badgers merchandising continues to do well, so much so that we have already ordered a new batch of Badger balls and also on the way are brand new Badger logo’d ball markers and pitch repairers, the sale of which goes some way to reducing the cost of days such as Birchwood whilst keeping the bank balance nice and healthy and Genty a happy boy! In respect of the golf itself, overall 64 people have now played on our Badger days since the first outing in May 2003. Unfortunately, our record of Harry Cutts being the sole Badger who has attended every day has fallen by the wayside since his unfortunate rib breakin’ lung bustin’ visit to Interbuild back in April and the incident involving Harry, our very own John Deely, a flagstone floor and an obscene amount of alcohol.
However, he managed to rise from his deathbed to attend the AGM - top Badger! In terms of our ability, or not as the case may be, the average handicap is now 20 compared to 24 last year, with the average points scored at our golf days remaining constant at 31, so even though it may not feel like it, we are generally getting better! It also shows the handicap adjustment system works and all credit should go to the members for the general improvement across the year especially those novices who have joined. Badger day winners this year were Alan Ruddy at Lullingstone with his first appearance on the winners rostrum. This was on the same day as winning the nearest the pin and team prize - bet the lucky bastard even got his leg over when he got home!
Steve Brewer took the honours at Birchwood and Phil Tweddle at South Essex, for both of them their first time on the winners rostrum. Peter Gallagher took the honours at Darenth, a great feat giving him his second title at Darenth and making him the first member to be Best Badger twice, so congratulations to Peter. Mr Gallagher also has a second place to his name, and in case you are worried he will continue to keep winning everything, we’ve cut the bastard 5 shots to 17 on the basis of the 45 points he scored, the bandit!
This year there were 2nd places for Simon Tuson at Lullingstone and for a pre-injury Harry Cutts at Birchwood, both of whom also have achieved third places before in previous seasons but who have still to get that elusive 1st place, so keep trying. Pat Judd came second at South Essex on his first time out with the Badgers and Nigel Smith at Darenth with his first time on the winners rostrum. Well Nige, all we can say is at least the other three stayed around long enough to collect their prizes, you ungrateful git!
3rd places went to John Deely at Lullingstone, for his second 3rd place and Richard Gent at Birchwood with his first appearance on the winners rostrum. Steve Brewer also got a third place at South Essex following on from his win earlier in the season at Birchwood and Richard Maggs came in third at Darenth with his first visit up to the rostrum. There were Nearest the Pins twice for Alan Ruddy at Lullingstone and Darenth, once for Alec Vallintine at Birchwood and once for Sharpie at South Essex, which means Steve has now won this prize a superb three times. Always accurate round a tight hole that boy!
Longest drives were won for the first time each by Richard Maggs at Lullingstone, Mike Stone at Birchwood and Peter Jupp at South Essex. Mark Smith won longest drive at Darenth, for an unprecedented 3rd time. Must be all that rugby he plays you know. His wife Liz only wishes you could be that straight, stay up as long and be as satisfying at home, but there you go, you can’t have everything can you!
Mark 'Longest Drive' Smith chats to/up Sarah Ashworth.
He plays rugby you know. She does now!
Steve 'Jonah' Beasley receives the Dribbly Dick Award
Looking ahead to next season, we commence in September with our inaugural visit to Woldingham on the Surrey/Kent borders, an absolutely superb club and a worthy replacement for Lullingstone. This will be followed by a welcome return in late November to Birchwood and in March, a return to South Essex. Despite our best attempts we have been unable to find a replacement for South Essex as certain aspects of our day there this season were a little disappointing, but we have been back recently whilst visiting Harry in his recuperation and we have to say it was in superb condition so we are going to give the course one more chance next year, hopefully you will agree with our decision, and hopefully we will be vindicated by a great day out.
The year will climax as ever with a welcome return to the delights of Darenth Valley next June. The highlight of the AGM was the announcement of the Badger Captain results for 2005-2006, the inaugural awarding of the Badger Captain Trophy and announcement of the Badger Captain for our 2006-2007 season. The appointment of the Badgers Captain is designed to award both performance and support of the non committee members, so we simply take the combined total of each members scores across the year and divide by four for the number of society days. This system really does give us the best all round Badger who has both played well and who has supported the society by turning up and playing.
This year was a very closely fought contest which was only decided at Darenth Valley. Only four Badgers managed to attend all four days greatly increasing their chances, 13 made it to 3 days putting the pressure on a little bit, but still in with a chance, but making things very difficult for themselves were the 12 of coming to just two days and the 7 who made it to just one day. We haven’t bothered listing those that didn’t attend any days so haven't registered any scores. All results are available on the download in the Handicaps sectionof the website. The placings, in reverse order, were;
Joint 33rd with an average of 8 points – Andy Kimpton, John Chapman, Kevin Archer and Spencer Powell
Joint 30th with an average of 9 points – Bob James, Pat Judd and Phil Priest
29th with an average of 10 points – Dave Guildford
Joint 27th with an average of 11 points – Andy Bawn and Mike Smith
Joint 24th with an average of 15 points – Dave Bullock, John Deely and Steve Hook
Joint 20th with an average of 16 points – Dave Jarvis, Mark Smith, Mike Healy and Paul Gover
Joint 18th with an average of 18 points – Alan Ruddy and Frank Kingham
17th with an average of 19 points – Steve Brewer
16th with an average of 20 points – Dick Watts
15th with an average of 22 points – Steve Sharp
Joint 10th with an average of 23 points – Alec Vallintine, Eugenio Caruso, Peter Jupp, Steve Beasley and Tim Holt
Joint 7th with an average of 24 points – John Pye, Nigel Smith and Richard Maggs
6th with an average of 25 points – Harry Cutts
5th with an average of 26 points – Phil Tweddle
4th with an average of 27 points – Peter Gallagher
3rd with an average of 28 points – Mike Stone
And finally, joint 1st with an average of 31 points – Richard Gent, and on the basis that a committee member cannot also be the Badger Captain, that leaves the Badger Captain, also with 31 points and inaugural winner of the Badger Captains Trophy as Simon Tuson.
Simon Tuson receives The Badger Captains Award from Mike Stone.
Other Pictures;
Mike Stone demonstrates how he handed in his notice to CWML
Mike then regales us all with his tales of being Badger Captain as John Deely slowly sinks into a coma....
'Jonah' Beasley, Steve Brewer, Alan Ruddy, Peter Gallagher, Eugenio Caruso, Mike Healy
Richard Maggs, 'Jonah' Beasley, Nigel Smith
Sarah Ashworth and Sharpie compare cleavages
(Sarah also takes note that it's true, Sharpie really is too fat to see his dick)
Sarah Ashworth talks Sharpie into doing a magic trick; 'OK Sarah, bend over and close your eyes. Can you feel my thumbs up your arse?' 'Yes' 'Now that's magic, love.....!
And for their next trick they did ballroom dancing....or was it another magic trick....or the next page in the Karma Sutra? Even Beasley looks bewildered and there's a boy who's been around a bit - answers on a postcard please......
